Nothing Like Being Mistaken As Pregnant On Your Birthday

Thank you for all of the birthday wishes that came through the comments, emails and calls. I wish I could report that I had a stellar day, but that wouldn’t be true.

The day started out crappy when I found myself playing the Molly Ringwald character in “Sixteen Candles” and Mark playing her family. Yes, I had to remind him that it was my birthday as he was walking out the door for work…’Are you even going to wish me a Happy Birthday?’ That has to be in the top 5 (or maybe top 10) marriage no-nos.

In his defense, this damn trial of his has taken him over. It’s all he talks about, and according to him, it’s all he dreams about lately too. He has been completely pre-occupied, though that still doesn’t completely excuse forgetting your wife’s birthday. Mark did come home with one of those cute singing cards and promised to take me somewhere nice as soon as the trial is over. The card said something about being “hotter than ever” (a total lie) and it sang “Ring of Fire” by Johnny Cash which is a bit of an inside joke between us.

So, my day didn’t start off too hot. It got worse.

After my self-indulgent 2-hour morning nap (after dropping the kiddos off at Miss Jennifer’s), I went up to Kohl’s to see about some new spring/summer clothes for the twins. In the process of walking back to the baby section, I had four salespersons bug me about signing up for the Kohl’s credit card. That alone is annoying because they no longer ask if they can help you; they just harrass you over 24% APR card. Umm, no thanks.

Anyway, so I get to the baby section and a middle aged saleswoman comes right up to me and immediately starts with the stupid credit card speech. I nicely say no thanks. She continues on and adds this…

You look like you are about to pop soon. A summer baby, right? Babies are so expensive. You are about to find that out! The more customers who sign up for the credit card, the more sales we can offer. You would be saving some good money.

She thought I was pregnant! Not just that, but VERY pregnant. She was standing behind me as I was looking at clothes hanging on the wall which was a good thing because I didn’t want her or anyone else to see the color drain from my face. I was already emotional because of what happened this morning with Mark, and now this. I immediately started to tear up. I just wanted out of there. This woman still kept yapping away, and I just opened my arms out to the side and dropped all of the merchandise I was holding to the floor. I walked off. That woman I’m sure was shocked and kept yelling “Ma’am, Ma’am” and I left the store.

When I got to the glass doors of the store entrance I saw a reflection of myself in the glass. I did not look pregnant. I turned to the side. I still did not look pregnant. There is no way someone could mistake me for being ready to pop.

Bitch.

Things were much better this evening when Mark got home, but it was still a blah birthday.

I still can’t believe that woman said that to me. I could halfway excuse it if it had been some teenaged girl, but this was a woman who looked like she had squeezed out one or five babes herself.

Okay, enough of that.

Miss Jennifer reported that the twins had a fussy day, and she thinks it has to do with teething. I agree. Kate is having a hard time with that new top tooth. Both kiddos have some kind of nasty sounding wet cough. Carson had a little mini tantrum when we got home because I wouldn’t let him dig in my purse. He is getting frustrated so easily nowadays. They both ate like little piglets at dinner…twice as much as normal.

Tomorrow is a new day. I plan on taking the little monsters out to the store and perhaps the park. 🙂

Thirty-One

I am 31 years old today. Unfortunately for me, Mark’s big out-of-town trial is starting tomorrow, so I guess we will do something belated.

My 2nd Birthday, 1979

My 6th Birthday, 1983, with the Cinderella cake. For those of you from my hometown, this party was held at that little ice cream shop on Broadway that is now Brides & Belles. I can still remember the feeling of that taffeta dress on my skin. I also remember getting a bike (with no training wheels!) at this party.

My 8th Birthday, 1985. You couldn’t have been a child in the ’80s without having at least one birthday party at the skating rink or at least not in my smallish hometown.

My 17th Birthday, 1994. Nice shoulder pads in the shirt, eh? My mom bought me and my friends a cookie cake that year.

My 30th Birthday, 2007. The twins had only been home for 2 weeks, and I was more sleep deprived than I even knew was possible. Mark and I went out for a fancy seafood dinner and came home and slept while my mom baby-sat.

As a kid, my mom always made sure my birthday was somewhat of a big deal. We did not have the money to have the over-the-top parties that a lot of kids are having now, but there was always cake, gifts and usually a slumber party.

The worst birthday was my 21st — the big drinking birthday. By some ironic and cruel fate, my 21st birthday fell on Easter. So no wild party. No drinking. No bars open.

As I get older, my birthday has become a reminder of how quickly time is passing. I can remember being 26, 21, 19, and 15 (and so on) so vividly that it feels like it was just yesterday. It scares me that time flashes by now. I want time to slow down so I can keep my babies babies for a while longer. Not to mention that there is still so much I would like to do with my own life, my own ambitions.

The kiddos are at Miss Jennifer’s today. They are going today and Wednesday instead of Tuesday and Thursday this week. That was my little birthday gift to myself…to do nothing and rest. 🙂

Bath & Brush

For the first time, the twins took a bath together! Yippee! I have been waiting for this moment for months and months. The hold up has been Kate’s inability/dislike for sitting unsupported. So, into the bath seat she went.

Carson had a great time. He loves to laugh and splash while he is in the tub. Kate, on the other hand, likes her bath time to be calm and peaceful. It’s safe to say that Carson has more fun with their first double bath. He pretty much splash her the entire time, and she was playing defense.

After bath time, the twins were introduced to their first real toothbrush. I’ve been just using a wet rag in the bath to clean their teeth (Kate’s teeth, Carson’s gums). Much to our surprise, they let me brush their teeth! I couldn’t believe it. Afterwards, I let them play with the newest element of our daily routine in the hopes that they will enjoy it.

Our First Toddler Tantrum

I knew this day would happen, and the best part was that Miss Kate decided to unleash her first major tantrum when we had family over at the house. Lucky me.

Now as it’s well documented that Kate can throw fuss fits with the best of them, but what she did yesterday afternoon is something I’ve never seen from her before.

Mark was up at the office working on his trial, and I had the twins down for their mid-day nap. My Uncles Gil and Mike and my mom stopped by to help me do a few handy things around the house — install Carson’s window treatment, fix the guest room ceiling fan that had dropped and was hanging dangerously by one wire, and install the double rod in the formal dining room for my new curtains.

Anyway, the twins woke up from a 2 hour nap, and I was trying to feed them lunch. Alas, the hunger strike continues and they weren’t very interested. Then suddenly Kate freaked out. I can’t pin point exactly what set her off — I think it may be all of the people at the house talking to her when she was still groggy from her nap — but she went off.

She was in the middle of the living room floor screaming, growling, red faced, kicking her legs, pounding the floor with her fits, flopping around like a fish out of water, and there wasn’t a single tear. Kate was mad. I tried to soothe her and ended up getting hit in the face. I am the one who can always calm down Kate, but she did not want me. She arched her back and continued on with her re-enactment of The Exorcist.

Carson sat calmly in his high chair just looking at her in amazement. He was probably thinking, ‘What’s her problem?’

After 15 minutes of this, I picked her up, ignored her attempts to scratch and hit me, and cuddle with her in our bed. That didn’t work. Finally she just ran out of steam. She calmed down and we played with one of her plastic bath ducks in bed.

I’ve never seen anything like that. She didn’t want a bottle. She didn’t want to be held. It was like she was just pissed for the sake of being pissed. I need to do some reading on these tantrums because I didn’t know what to do about it. At first I was concerned that something was wrong — is she hurt? is she hungry? did Carson steal food from her tray? what brought this on?

The amazing thing is that it was like a light switch. Once she had calmed down, we came out of the bedroom and she was all smiles. She even let my Uncle Mike hold her.

Ugg. I’m not looking forward to a repeat of that performance even though I know it’s inevitable. Even Carson has been throwing little frustration tantrums lately — usually over toys or even Kate getting her food first.

In other news…

Mark is feeling much better. My dining room curtains look wonderful. I will have to get some pictures soon. I want to take the tots to the playground today, but the sky looks like it’s trying to decide if it wants to rain today and just be nasty and muggy.

Tooth Watch #3

Two big things happened in the world of Kate today…

1. Not only did she sleep through the night, but she also went straight to sleep when I put her in bed. She was wide awake when I walked her into her bedroom at 7:30 PM, and usually she will fuss/cry for 5 minutes before finally caving into glorious sleep. Not a single peep! Perhaps she is getting used to our new schedule and she knows I won’t come and get her so it’s best to just go night-night.
2. Tooth #3 has arrived, quietly. Kate’s top front tooth on the left suddenly and without much fan fare from Kate arrived over night. So she now has her two bottom front teeth and one on top. They are coming in fast now…finally.